The whole process of getting up and doing the “morning jobs” was more cheerful, Jane found, because she had Mrs. Dimble with her. Mark [Jane’s husband] often helped; but he always took the view—and Jane could feel it even if he did not express it in words—that “anything would do” and that Jane made a lot of unnecessary work and that men could keep house with a tithe of the fuss and trouble which women made about it, Mark's help was one of the commonest causes of quarrels between them (That Hideous Strength by C. S. Lewis, 1996, p80, originally published in 1945).

In That Hideous Strength, Jane’s despises being a wife. And her husband Mark doesn’t help by despising the way she works in the home.

Maybe it’s true that a man would do the “morning jobs” in less time and with less effort. But over time the soul would be taken out of the home. The glory would depart. Maybe a man could find a way to be more efficient, but he would be less effective.

“Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates” (Proverbs 31:31 NKJV).

What do you think?
Joseph

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Disclaimer: I'm not your pastor, lawyer, accountant, economist, doctor. I’m a regular guy who wants the freedom to love and enjoy God, my wife, my kids, and my work. And I believe pursuing that freedom will make it easier for others to do the same. This isn’t professional advice. If you need professional advice, talk to a professional.

“Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present (George Washington’s Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior by George Washington, written some time around 1746).

I’ve seen etiquette used in two ways. One is to make yourself superior to those around you (e.g., think of Bingley’s sisters in Pride and Prejudice). And the other is quoted above, to show respect to those around you.

We so easily take something like etiquette—which was designed to love our neighbor—and turn it into something that harms our neighbor.

It’s like being proud of our humility. While it sounds absurd to say out loud, if you’re a human, you know you’ve done it.

Whatever you think about etiquette, simply showing respect to those around you will do you well.

What do you think?
Joseph

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I hope simply because God has commanded me to hope. Hope is obedience.

“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful” (Hebrews 10:23 NKJV).

Obedient hope looks like open hands that trust God to give and take according to His greater Story. Sometimes it looks like gratitude and wonder at that greater Story; sometimes it looks like gratitude and grief when something is taken and you don’t know why.

But the hands are always open and the heart is always grateful.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“‘Tragedy’ is used here (at least initially) very loosely, as a story in which the characters begin neutrally or well, but slide inexorably to a bad end; ‘comedy’ is a story in which the characters may face dangers, perhaps dangers of great intensity, but ultimately rise to a happy ending. ‘Deep comedy’ brings two additional nuances: First, in deep comedy the happy ending is uncontaminated by any fear of future tragedy, and, second, in deep comedy the characters do not simply end as well as they began, but progress beyond their beginning. Comedy may move from glory to glory restored, but deep comedy moves from glory to added glory. While the classical world did produce comedy, it did not produce ‘deep comedy’” (Deep Comedy by Peter J. Leithart, 2006, pXII emphasis mine).

There is a story that fixes the problems and resolves all the conflict by bringing us back to the beginning. God’s Story for His Church, however, progresses us beyond the beginning. It moves us from glory to added glory.

Adam was a king without a robe. He was naked. The Second Adam was clothed in glory (Revelation 1:12-20).

Before Adam fell, he had a type of glory; but his glory cannot compare to Christ’s glory after He did what Adam failed to do.

What do you think?
Joseph

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Here indeed is pure and real religion: faith so joined with an earnest fear of God that this fear also embraces willing reverence, and carries with it such legitimate worship as is prescribed in the law. And we ought to know this fact even more diligently: all men have a vague general veneration for God, but very few really reverence him; and wherever there is a great ostentation in ceremonies, sincerity of heart is rare indeed (Calvin: Institutes of the Christian Religion by John Calvin, 1960, p43, originally published in Latin in 1536, emphasis mine).

One of our pastors recently preached on 2 Samuel 6, and I happened to read the above text shortly after.

In 2 Samuel 6, David removed his robe and every other glory and danced humbly before the LORD. There was no ostentation.

Michal, David’s wife, despised David in her heart. She expected him to show his own (not God’s) strength and power and glory as he (not God) brought the ark back. She expected him to be like her father Saul.

But Saul had no sincerity of heart. And David was a man after God’s own heart.

What do you think?
Joseph

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If I tell you about my day job, but the real excitement in my voice comes out when I talk about my side hustle, you know what that usually means. I’m mentally trying to move myself out of my day job so I can eventually do my side hustle full time.

If that’s true about day jobs and side hustles, don’t talk that way about your family. If you do, you have things backwards.

What do you think?
Joseph

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One way is to think longterm with regard to enjoyment. You’ll make more fruitful decisions if you focus on enjoying the next 20 years, then if you only focus on enjoying the next 20 minutes. Think longterm about how big the future payoff is, instead of settling for satisfying a present craving.

The other way is to think short-term with regard to suffering. I’ve heard the mentality of soldiers who push through the Navy Seal Hell Week is quite different from those who quit. Those who quit listen to the voice that says, “I can’t keep this up for three more days.” And those who push through say, “I can last one more hour” or even “I can do one more rep.”

Here’s an example for how I hold these two things together. I have a big dream that none of my descendants will be lost even until Christ comes back. It’s not a crazy dream, because it’s one of God’s promises, “He remembers His covenant forever, The word which He commanded, for a thousand generations,” (Psalm 105:8 NKJV). While it’s not crazy, it’s way too big for me to accomplish. I can’t even imagine one thousand generations of faithfulness, but I know what obedience to God looks like today.

My longterm dream is a thousand generations. But my short-term action is taking one more step down the path God has put in front of me.

I have almost no midrange goals. I have big dreams and today’s next step.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“He must be made to feel (he’d better not put it into words) ‘how different we Christians are’; and by ‘we Christians’ he must really, but unknowingly, mean ‘my set’; and by ‘my set’ he must mean not ‘The people who, in their charity and humility, have accepted me’, but ‘The people with whom I associate by right’” (The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, 2001, p132, originally published in 1942).

Screwtape describes a subtle way for Wormwood to lead his man into the sin of pride.

The Body of Christ is not a club. There is no initiation or hazing that earns me the right to join. Nor am I so worthy that I may join on my own merit.

The Christian has nothing in himself to be proud of.

But I happily associate myself with that Body and I’m humbled to have been brought into the Church.

We Christians are Christians not by right, but by grace.

What do you think?
Joseph

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Successful businesses don’t pay their expenses. Their customers pay those expenses plus some extra. And that extra is called profit.

One of those expenses is taxes. So businesses don’t pay taxes. And landlords don’t pay taxes. Customers and renters pay those taxes for the business owner and landlord. That’s not an opinion, that’s just math. And praise God for innovators whose products and services that are still affordable in spite of heavy taxation.

What is the principle here? Producers pay less taxes; consumers pay more taxes. When you buy eggs, you’re paying taxes on every chicken bought and sold by the chicken farmer. The chicken farmer needs to pass those taxes along or else he goes under and no one gets eggs.

This is why it’s hard for those with fixed incomes. The weight of taxes falls more heavily on those who no longer produce as much as they used to.

I’m thankful for tax breaks, but I’ve seen them come and go. So how does one thrive in a world of exploitation? Simply pay attention to the first words God spoke to the man and woman:

“Then God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth’” (Genesis 1:28 NKJV).

Be fruitful. Once you have something fruitful, multiply it. And take responsibility for whatever God has put under your care.

Be productive and enjoy consuming. Don’t just do one or the other.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“I had always vaguely felt facts to be miracles in the sense that they are wonderful: now I began to think them miracles in the stricter sense that they were willful. I mean that they were, or might be, repeated exercises of some will. In short, I had always believed that the world involved magic: now I thought that perhaps it involved a magician. And this pointed a profound emotion always present and subconscious; that this world of ours has some purpose; and if there is a purpose, there is a person. I had always felt life first as a story: and if there is a story there is a storyteller” (Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton, 2001, p85, originally published in 1908 emphasis mine).

There’s meaning or there isn’t. Those are the only options.

You live with wonder or with nihilism. If wonder, then there is One who is called “Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isaiah 9:6 NKJV). If nihilism, then there can be no meaning.

The atheist can’t have meaning in his life. If he says he creates his own meaning, his meaning is made up. It’s a façade.

If there is purpose, there is a Person. If life is story, there is a Storyteller.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“It is not excess of thought but defect of fertile and generous emotion that marks them out. Their heads are no bigger than the ordinary: it is the atrophy of the chest beneath that makes them seem so” (The Abolition of Man by C.S. Lewis, 2001, p25, originally published in 1944).

Did Popeye have big forearms? Or did it just seem that way because his biceps were so small?

Some think themselves to be intellectual, but they aren’t any smarter than you or me. It only seems that way because they lack so much in their ability to feel.

Do you despise emotion? Then maybe you’re like a man with an ordinary-sized head and an extra small chest. Do you despise ideas? Then maybe you are a man with an ordinary-sized heart and an extra small brain.

Love God with your heart AND soul AND mind AND strength.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“…the Christian account of history is eschatological not only in the sense that it comes to definitive and everlasting end, but in the sense that the end is a glorified beginning, not merely a return to origins. The Christian Bible moves not from garden lost to garden restored, but from garden to garden-city. God gives with interest. To say the same in other words, though the Bible gives full recognition to sin and its effect on creation and humanity, the Christian account of history is ultimately comic” (Deep Comedy by Peter J. Leithart, 2006, pXI emphasis mine).

The question each religion and philosophy must wrestle with is, “How does one live the best life knowing he has to die one day?” Stoicism says to be indifferent to all events good or bad, that way you’ll not be surprised by death when it comes. Epicureanism says to have enough pleasure in your life so you forget about death altogether.

The Truth of the Gospel says, “Death is swallowed up in victory. O Death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?” (1 Corinthians 15:54-55 NKJV). And, “Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord” (1 Corinthians 15:58 NKJV emphasis mine).

How does the Christian live the best life knowing he has to die one day? The Christian enjoys his labor, because his labor is not in vain. Death has been killed in Christ.

Christianity ends in a wedding between Christ and His Church; every other philosophy ends in death. Christianity is a comedy; every other philosophy is a tragedy.

This comedy doesn’t end with us wearing robes and playing harps in the clouds like so many Far Side comics would have us believe. And it doesn’t end with us back where humanity started in the Garden of Eden. It ends with a glorious beginning. It ends with a garden that has flourished into a garden-city.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“…you cannot behold Him clearly unless you acknowledge Him to be the fountainhead and source of every good. From this too would arise the desire to cleave to Him and trust in Him, but for the fact that man’s depravity seduces his mind from rightly seeking him” (Calvin: Institutes of the Christian Religion by John Calvin, 1960, p42, originally published in Latin in 1536).

God isn’t the biggest fish in the fishpond. He’s not the fish above all fishes who gets to push the others around. He is the “fountainhead and source of every good.” Without the fountainhead, there would be no pond at all.

You cannot grasp His glory unless you understand this truth.

Do not let your depravity seduce you into thinking you obey God just because He’s bigger and stronger. Desire to cleave to Him and trust in Him, because all that is good comes from Him.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“Men are not angered by mere misfortune but by misfortune conceived as injury. And the sense of injury depends on the feeling that a legitimate claim has been denied…It is the unexpected visitor (when he looked forward to a quiet evening), or the friend’s talkative wife (turning up when he looked forward to a tête-à-tête with the friend), that throw him out of gear…They anger him because he regards his time as his own and feels that it is being stolen. You must therefore zealously guard in his mind the curious assumption ‘My time is my own’” (The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, 2001, p111-112, originally published in 1942 emphasis mine).

To be productive, you must say yes to some things and no to others. When you say yes to one thing, you’re saying no to something else. So plan your yes’s with wisdom.

But this is not because your time is your own. You should never guard your time for you. Your time belongs to God.

Here is a litmus test. Do you feel personally wronged when someone takes advantage of your time? If so, you foolishly believe your time is yours. Confess that sin and ask God to change you.

Consider how Christ handled the time He was given. Sometimes He went to pray by Himself. Or He chose to go to one place instead of another. Sometimes He preached to one group instead of another. Jesus needed to make choices. But He didn’t make those choices for Himself. He knew His mission and He focused His time toward that mission.

And part of everyone’s mission is God interrupting you with things you might think are a waste of time.

What do you think?
Joseph

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“And the LORD struck the child that Uriah’s wife bore to David, and it became ill. David therefore pleaded with God for the child, and David fasted and went in and lay all night on the ground. So the elders of his house arose and went to him, to raise him up from the ground. But he would not, nor did he eat food with them. Then on the seventh day it came to pass that the child died. And the servants of David were afraid to tell him that the child was dead. For they said, ‘Indeed, while the child was alive, we spoke to him, and he would not heed our voice. How can we tell him that the child is dead? He may do some harm!’

“When David saw that his servants were whispering, David perceived that the child was dead. Therefore David said to his servants, ‘Is the child dead?’

“And they said, ‘He is dead.’

“So David arose from the ground, washed and anointed himself, and changed his clothes; and he went into the house of the LORD and worshiped. Then he went to his own house; and when he requested, they set food before him, and he ate. Then his servants said to him, ‘What is this that you have done? You fasted and wept for the child while he was alive, but when the child died, you arose and ate food.’

“And he said, ‘While the child was alive, I fasted and wept; for I said, “Who can tell whether the LORD will be gracious to me, that the child may live?” But now he is dead; why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me’” (2 Samuel 12:15-23 NKJV emphasis mine).

Here David shows us true hope. In hope David pleaded, fasted, and wept to God for his child’s life.

When the LORD said no, David rose and washed, anointed himself, changed his clothes, went into God’s house and worshiped, and went to his own house and ate.

It seems like Christians hope for very little, because they are afraid of being disappointed. And on the rare chance they hope for much, they grow bitter at God if He says no. (In fact, David’s servants worried David would react this way once he found out the child was dead.)

But David hopes for something great. He hopes for something only the LORD can provide—the life of his son. And when God says no, he worships.

He says with Job, “The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; Blessed be the name of the LORD” (Job 1:21 NKJV).

Instead of hoping for few blessings and few trials. Hope for much, and praise God in all things.

What do you think?
Joseph

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I used a fountain to describe how to do this. At the top of the fountain is God the Source of all truth, goodness, beauty, joy, freedom, love, etc. That Source fills up the first bowl of the fountain which is you. Once you are filled, that Source overflows into the next bowl which is your spouse. Once that bowl is filled, it can overflow into your kids. Once that bowl is filled, it can overflow into your work. And finally it can overflow into everything else. 1) God, 2) your spouse, 3) your kids, 4) your work, and 5) everything else.

In other words, you love your spouse more by loving God first. You love your kids more by loving God and your spouse first. And so on.

Something about that post has been bugging me. The word priority makes me think of a series of unrelated boxes that need to be arranged in a certain order. As if I’m supposed take turns spending time with each box, but I need to make sure I spend more time with some boxes than I do with others.

The fountain analogy, on the other hand, makes me think of interconnected pools with one flowing into the other. There are no priorities. God fills the first pool and everything follows from there.

I’ve been leaning away from prioritizing my loves, and leaning toward God’s love flowing through my loves. Priorities divide; the fountain connects.

This reminds me of the water flowing out of Ezekiel’s temple:

Then he brought me back to the door of the temple; and there was water, flowing from under the threshold of the temple toward the east…And when the man went out to the east with the line in his hand, he measured one thousand cubits, and he brought me through the waters; the water came up to my ankles. Again he measured one thousand and brought me through the waters; the water came up to my knees. Again he measured one thousand and brought me through; the water came up to my waist. Again he measured one thousand, and it was a river that I could not cross; for the water was too deep, water in which one must swim, a river that could not be crossed (Ezekiel 47:1-5 NKJV emphasis mine).

The water flowing from the temple is healing water. At first it’s so shallow, it can flow under the threshold. Then after a thousand cubits, it’s ankle deep. After another thousand, it’s knee deep. Then waist deep. And, finally, it’s a river that cannot be crossed.

This is what happens when God loves you. You are a conduit of that love to your spouse, your kids, your employer/employees/coworkers, and everyone else. And the healing river only gets deeper as it goes.

What do you think?
Joseph

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Disclaimer: I'm not your pastor, lawyer, accountant, economist, doctor. I’m a regular guy who wants the freedom to love and enjoy God, my wife, my kids, and my work. And I believe pursuing that freedom will make it easier for others to do the same. This isn’t professional advice. If you need professional advice, talk to a professional.

“All the towering materialism which dominates the modern mind rest ultimately upon one assumption; a false assumption. It is supposed that if a thing goes on repeating itself it is probably dead; a piece of clockwork…The sun rises every morning. I do not rise every morning; but the variation is due not to my activity, but to my inaction…it might be true that the sun rises regularly because he never gets tired of rising. His routine might be due, not a to lifelessness, but to a rush of life…A child kicks his legs rhythmically through excess, not absence, of life.…They always say, ‘Do it again’; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony. It is possible that God says every morning, ‘Do it again’ to the sun; and every evening, ‘Do it again’ to the moon” (Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton, 2001, p83-84, originally published in 1908 emphasis mine).

Are you strong enough to exult in monotony? Or do you need constant variation?

Spontaneity doesn’t lead to life. I once spontaneously tried to do the worm, but it looked more like the fish.

How do you bring joy to your household? Through variation or through routine?

My family’s routine hangs on three things. Did we enjoy weekly worship? Did we enjoy daily family dinner? Did each one of us take one more step today down the path God has put in front of us? That structure is what all other routines are built on.

Adventure is another type of joy, but one of its chief glories is to make us remember the beauty of monotony. Summer sausage and trail mix are amazing on a backpacking trip, and they also make you rejoice when you return for a home cooked meal.

What do you think?
Joseph

I myself do not enjoy the society of small children: because I speak from within the Tao I recognize this is a defect in myself—just as a man may have to recognize that he is tone deaf, or colour blind (The Abolition of Man by C.S. Lewis, 2001, p19, originally published in 1944).

Here C.S. Lewis uses Tao as a description of a sort of natural law. Behaving in accordance with the Tao is behaving in accordance with how God made the world.

The Tao reveals a flaw within himself. According to the Tao, one should enjoy small children. Lewis sees he isn’t living how God would have him live.

Are there good things you don’t enjoy? Do you enjoy good literature or is it too dense? What about good music? Movies?

This isn’t about things that are morally good or bad (although that matters, too!). It’s about art and story that is objectively well done.

A man who only eats junk food, will lose his taste for everything else. Make a decision to love what is good and let it change you.

What do you think?
Joseph

“For what is more consonant with faith than to recognize that we are naked of all virtue, in order to be clothed by God? That we are empty of all good, to be filled by him? That we are slaves of sin, to be freed by him? Blind, to be illumined by him? Lame, to be made straight by him? Weak, to be sustained by him? To take away from us all occasion for glorying, that he alone may stand forth gloriously and we glory in him?” (Calvin: Institutes of the Christian Religion by John Calvin, 1960, p13, originally published in Latin in 1536).

How much do you contribute? Are you wearing some amount of clothing and need God to sew some patches? Are you filled with some amount of good and just need to be topped off? Is your vision only blurry, your legs only wobbly, and your strength a little weaker than it should be?

Are you already free without God?

Is God a lifeguard saving you from drowning? Or are you on the bottom of the lake “dead in trespasses and sins” (Ephesians 2:1 NKJV).

No. You were naked, empty, a slave, blind, lame, and weak. You were dead and “you He made alive” (Ephesians 2:1 NKJV).

This is beautiful. In you, there is no occasion for glorying. Your glory is in Him.

How could I let my pride prefer my own thimbleful of glory (do I even have that much)? When I could glory in Him without limit?

What do you think?
Joseph

“When [Jesus] had come to His own country, He taught them in their synagogue, so that they were astonished and said, ‘Where did this Man get this wisdom and these mighty works? Is this not the carpenter’s son? Is not His mother called Mary? And His brothers James, Joses, Simon, and Judas? And His sisters, are they not all with us? Where then did this Man get all these things?’ So they were offended at Him.

“But Jesus said to them, ‘A prophet is not without honor except in his own country and in his own house.’ Now He did not do many mighty works there because of their unbelief” (Matthew 13:54-58 NKJV emphasis mine).

Ideas and reality are connected. The first flows into the second. It’s absurd to say you’re a woman trapped in a man’s body. It’s also absurd to say something is good in theory, but it doesn’t work in reality. If an idea doesn’t match reality, it’s a bad idea.

When you read the end of the passage above, what do you think their unbelief looked like? Were people asking Jesus to miraculously heal them, but Jesus was helpless because of their unbelief? Is Jesus limited?

No, it was their unbelief that prevented them from even asking the question in the first place.

“Then behold, men brought on a bed a man who was paralyzed, whom they sought to bring in and lay before Him. And when they could not find how they might bring him in, because of the crowd, they went up on the housetop and let him down with his bed through the tiling into the midst before Jesus.

“When He saw their faith, He said to him, ‘Man, your sins are forgiven you…I say to you, arise, take up your bed, and go to your house.’

“Immediately he rose up before them, took up what he had been lying on, and departed to his own house, glorifying God. And they were all amazed, and they glorified God and were filled with fear, saying, ‘We have seen strange things today!’” (Luke 5:18-26 NJKV emphasis mine).

Jesus saw their faith, but what did He actually see? Did He see something hidden deep down in their hearts? No, the faith of the paralytic’s friends was evident. It could be seen in their actions. Faith has legs.

What do you think?
Joseph