How To Find A Wife
Finding a godly wife is, next to your salvation, the most important thing you can do in your life.
“Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies” (Proverbs 31:10).
Here’s how to find a wife:
First, grow in wisdom to know what a godly wife is. You need to be able to know her when you see her. The entire book of Proverbs is a father talking to his son about women. The wise woman, the foolish woman, and how to become the kind of man that a wise woman would want to marry. And how to continue to love her after you’re married so that she grows more and more glorious. This becomes clear when you see how everything in Proverbs culminates in a woman (Proverbs 31:10-31).
Second, work hard and figure out your purpose, and what kind of helper you need to succeed in that purpose: “And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him” (Genesis 2:18).
Third, consider what you are attracted to in a woman and what you are not. Think of women that you’ve been attracted to in the past. What are the deal breakers for you, both positive and negative?
(Note that I’m not talking about physical attraction. Physical attraction is important, but knowing that you want to be physically attracted to her is all you need. You don’t need any more physical details than that.)
Fourth, write out a description of the woman from the second and third points above.
Fifth, write out a description of who you need to become in order to attract and lead that woman.
Sixth, throw the description of the woman away and take steady, consistent steps toward becoming the description of the man you need to become. Slow and consistent progress is better than fast and erratic progress.
This approach works.
Remember that time you bought a car and then you started noticing a bunch of other cars just like yours? This works for a similar reason. Once you know what a godly woman looks like, you’ll start to see her. And you’ll stop wasting time with ungodly women.
And—most importantly—once you know what you need to become, she’ll start to see you.
What do you think?
Joseph